I’m sure that there are some people out there who believe that happiness is something out of their control, and others who think that it is something we have to fight long and hard for to obtain. In other words, it’s a personal journey we all must take internally to get there.
Unfortunately, in this day and age, the number of people suffering from clinical depression is frightening in itself. It’s quite ironic how we, as humans, are rapidly expanding and developing useful technologies that “connect” people to one another, yet so many people out there feel more alone than ever.
So what does this tell you about the real reason why people these days are stuck in a funk of unhappiness? I think a lot of it has to do with how society puts too much a major emphasis on achievement (academically and financially) and not enough emphasis on enjoying life and being friggin’ happy!! I get so frustrated at how society functions at times.
I’m sure there are people dying to travel, spend time with family and friends, and actually wake up every morning without feeling dread at having to drag their ass’s back to the office.
Now I’m not claiming to present myself as some happiness guru with what I’m going to write about, but in my personal experience I can honestly tell you that refusing to do anything to change your current state of unhappiness is a one way ticket to misery, pain, frustration and sleepless nights crying into your pillow hating yourself and your life.
I’ve had to live with the above-mentioned emotions for a very long time. This isn’t something I’m disclosing lightly but I realize that some people need to hear (or in this case read) about the real-life problems people face in order to reflect back on their own life in order to make the necessary changes.
A part of me wishes that I was stronger back then and I should have dealt with my problems better… but that’s life. You’re not meant to get everything right the first time around.
Even if you make the same mistake once, twice, or even three times (or maybe more like me), if that’s what it takes for you to learn and get the value out of that life lesson, maybe all the pain was worth it in order for you to grow.
Don’t you think so? When I was going through it I didn’t but now I do.
Reflecting on my younger self, I let external factors control me for too long. Growing up… man, I was one angry little muffin LOL!!
(Ah yes I remember that expression on my face all too well LOL)
I had a lot of bad experiences with other people growing up, like bullying, exclusion, teasing (this kinda ties in with bullying me thinks..ah well). Anyway, point is, because of those experiences, I drew away from people. Didn’t socialize, kept to myself, and hid from my problems by flying into my imaginary fun zone where my own thoughts served to entertain me in my time of need (good god that sounds a little sad LOL)
One thing I don’t mind admitting to myself, and I hope not to come across as egotistical or anything like that, but I have one wacky sense of imagination (hey comes from years of practice of imaginary scenario creations) ;D
So How Did I Deal With my Unhappiness?
I think when it comes to this part everyone deals with their problems and emotions differently. After all, what works for one person might not necessarily work for you.
After a series of “negative” events, I realized that things weren’t going to change if I just kept doing things the way I always did. I decided to get out of my comfort zone and try to change my way of thinking.
I think changing your mindset is the hardest thing someone can do. So anyone out there reading this who has greatly changed their lives by reshaping their attitude, I have great respect for you, my friend.
After I stumbled upon a crossroad in my life where it was either get back up and go forward or stay down and live a life half dead for as long as it takes to snap out of it, I decided to stop complaining and take responsibility for my own future. I decided to regain control of how I feel and live my life how I want to.
Mind you, I had to go through a lot of emotions, thinking and trial and error to get to that stage.
When you sit back and let your life stroll by you passively: 1/ you’re going to feel very bored, 2/ feeling unfulfilled follows naturally, and 3/ your life will feel void of meaning.
That’s why you need to beat out that urge to sit back and watch and do something. It doesn’t have to be big, just something small to start out with is fine. Whether it’s finally quitting that job that you’ve hated for so long, giving a new relationship a chance, or doing something completely new in your life.
For me, I decided to do something that I never thought I would end up doing. And that was starting my own business. I got a lot of negativity from friends and family but I made my decision and stuck with it. I wanted to start my own online business so that I could have the time I wanted to finally do the things to enjoy my life and not wind up miserable with some job. The road has been hard but I’m glad I took the first step to taking control of my life.